My hubby and I were sitting around the house one lazy Sunday.
We decided a ride in the country would be a nice Sunday outing.
As I got up to get ready,I had an uncanny feeling
that my lazy Sunday was about to come to am end.
And sure enough,my hubby tells me to put my hiking boots on.
As I turned to look at him,he has this silly grin on his face.
But honey,I say to him,why do I need my hiking boots?
Duh.Playing dumb didn't save me from my fate.
Like a good wife,I go and put my hiking boots on.
You know,the ones that weighs 10 pounds each.
Right away my feet start complaining.
These feet have not seen these boots for a few years.
But they remember they are not comfortable.
We are in the car headed for the Blueridge Parkway.
Normally this is a beautiful area to go for a drive.
But on this lazy Sunday,I knew it was not going to be a drive only trip.We drive through several tunnels and then it dawns on me.
I know where my hubby is headed.
The Devil's Court House
When you get to the top of this peak there is beautiful view.
Its the getting there that could kill you.
Ten years ago this climb was a snap.
But now I am 59 years old and slightly over weight.
My hubby is 55 and has a pouch for a tummy.
Neither one of us gets to much exercise.
This will not be an easy hike.We get out of the car and head for the path
that leads to the peak.
I have taken 20 steps and already I am gasping for air.
I look up,expecting to be half way to the top.
Yeah,right.
My hubby tells me,we will walk slow and take our time.
Like I actually believe him.
I think not.
Women,why is it when men get in the woods they become Daniel Boone?
They start walking like they are chasing bear.
The slow pace is soon forgotten,where did it go?
I am watching where I step.
There are all kinds of creepy crawlers in the woods.
I am also on the look out for "doggie poo"
If its there,I will find it.
I finally look up and what do I see?
Nothing but trees and sky.
My hubby has went ahead and left me.
He shouts down at me to hurry up and I am thinking "#$&$#@*"...censored.I pick my foot up and as I go to set it down~there it is~
the dreaded doggie poo.
I wasn't quick enough to stop my foot from landing.
My hubby had just went through here and he missed it.
Do you know how hard it is to get "doggie poo" off of a hiking boot?
All those little grooves in the sole.
No grass to wipe your boot on,just twigs,rocks and leaves.
You take a stick and you dig at it,gagging all the time.
The rest of the day you smell like "doggie poo".
When I finally catch up with my "dear" hubby,he has the gall to tell me
I smell like "doggie poo",except he didn't say poo.
After a few choice words to my "DEAR" hubby,we continued up the gentle slope..right.We pass people coming down and they all smile at us.
I know what they are thinking behind those smiles.
They are thinking,those fools have a long ways to go.
They will be darn lucky to get there and back down before dark.
We are barely half way up that "little hill".
My hubbys words,not mine.
I am ready to turn back,when he suggests we take a break.
He pulls out a cigarette,lights it and offers it to me.
I do believe he plans on leaving my body in these woods.
I am gasping for air and panting.I can't breathe,
and he offers me a cigarette?
I am a smoker but my lungs are telling me "just say no"
I am thinking about a nice cool drink of water.
Even the water is smarter than me.
It stayed back at the house.
Why is when you don't have water you want it worse?
Break is over.The trail looks steeper than before.
I tell my feet to get on the move.
But I am not sure my feet are still there.
They are numb from being cooped up all day in hiking boots
that weigh 15 pounds each.(smile)
I am wishing I was bare footed,but can you imagine
"doggie poo" and no shoes? Yucky.It seems we have been hiking for hours
but the sign said a 20 minute hike.
Who times these hikes I wonder?
Probably a child of 12.
We finally reach the top,alive and still breathing.
The air is thinner up here and my lungs are demanding air.
Again the offer of a cigarette,what is with this man?
The view from up here is fantastic after you are breathing again.
You can only look at a view for so long.
We decide to start back down.
I just knew the trip down would be easier.
haha lol lmao.. yeah right.
I spent a lot of time sliding on my butt.
Thank God I have a lot of padding in that area.
As soon as we got back to the car those hiking boots
rode in the back seat all the way home.
Now they are in the back of the closet,under some other shoes.
They are darn lucky they didn't get thrown out.
And yes.I did scrub them before I put them away to be seen no more.
